Captain Cat: My First Mate, Can Opener, is on the one true and straight path to personal preparation for buying the yacht of my dreams and slingshoting me into the cruising life I deserve. Fill in the details, Can Opener.
Can Opener: Yeah. What he said.
Captain Cat: Hey! You told me you were a litter-trained smarty-pants with an MBA from Wharton. What kind of incoherent language is that?
Can Opener: Captain Cat, after years of cranking out financial plans and strategy for a faceless conglomerate, I realised spoken words just got in the way. The written word is king.
Captain Cat: Yeah, well king this! I need you to listen up, take notes on what I teach you and do a TON of research. And that research includes asking a lot of humans a lot of questions, getting opinions and advice, and relaying all that good info back to me. Then I can tell you what the right answer is.
Can Opener: Right. Practice talking. I'm on it. Right after I fry up the cheese burgers for dinner.
Captain Cat: Nix, Can Opener. The "Cod and Plaice Dinner Packs" will do nicely. We're on a lean-protein performance diet regime. You can serve me in the east wing. I fancy the garden view tonight.
Can Opener: You didn't mention any of this stuff when you showed up one night banging on my back door, screaming for food... How is it that an old salt sailing cat knocks on my door when sailing around the world was exactly what I wanted to do?
Captain Cat: Match made in heaven. Now go get the Cod and Plaice.
Can Opener: Yeah, um...
Captain Cat: Yes, Captain!
Can Opener: Yes, Captain.
(transcribed by the Can Opener)
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